Saturday, November 5, 2011

Mind Games

I was here again. It didn't matter where here was. Just that it existed and that it was where I was. I knew three things, as follows: I was here. There was a house here. The cat is also here. And it's in that we all have in common. I start walking toward the house. The cat follows me. It is black. But everything is black. Or white. The cat stays in my shadow, cast by some invisible light source that must also be here. Everything is silent.

The house looms above me. Stretching to become a roof, moving around me to make walls, and suddenly I am inside. This is not odd. There is a scratching at the door. It's the cat, it's always the cat. I move to open it, a sense of dread building in me. What if this time, it's not the cat? What if this time it's a monster, a beast with tentacles or a masked man. Come to take me away or gobble me up. In my head, horror music plays.

I open the door. It's the cat. I was being stupid, it's always the cat. We turn and walk up the stairs, the colors get darker, somehow in the monochrome world. This is also not odd.  We are in a corridor, there are doors. There are nothing but doors. All around me. I am no longer in the house. But I am still here.

I open a door, at 7'clock to me. It's the same, a room with a box. I dare not open the box though. I did that once. It was.. unpleasant. the memories are faded. I take another door, one I haven't before. It's red suddenly. Why is it red? It's never been red. I collapse in anxiety. This should not happen. This has happened before. Something always changes, I never remember what, only that it changes. Perhaps it's been red before, and this situation has played out exactly the same. How pointless. I center myself on this thought and stand. The cat watches me. It's never not watching me. I don't think I've seen the back of it's head.

I open the red door. And fall through. I am falling, then I stop. Everything is black. Except for myself. I can see myself. Standing in blackness. There's the cat. Black on the blackness, watching me. The music plays.
What is going on? I guess I have never really known that. What a redundant question.

The music heightens, It's in my head and around me, the cat smiled. But cats don't smile. I see a flicker of a childhood memory of a smiling purple cat. I brush it away. Cat's do not smile. Especially so white. So eerily, so much larger then it's mouth.

I scream. It's not a cat. It's the masked.. thing. It grins at me. It's always fucking grinning at me. I run at it. It's behind me. I run at it. I want to tear it's stupid mask off. It's behind me, grinning. Always grinning. What am I running on? It's White now. Marble. It's still grinning. I want my cat back. I run at the masked thing. It's grin splits, the teeth sharpened. It swallows me.

I wake up.

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